Pictures from God: Surpassing Greatness

            Eph. 1:18-19

“I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened, so that you may know…what is the surpassing greatness of His power toward us who believe.”

I read that today and a hard time with it. And one main problem arose in my mind that I struggled with:

If God chooses to give that to me, what would that look like in my life? What does that look like in the lives of others who have chosen to believe? I think of “great” people and I think of course of Paul who changed so many lives through his works. He was great. But what about those who in history and today do not receive much credit for their greatness? Maybe they are great but their greatness is not celebrated famously. Is that still “great?”

            In my life, I realized recently, as I’ve been discussing with God, my need for confirmation in order to feel successful or noteworthy, inspiring, great, etc… So much so that it is hard for me be satisfied or enjoy anything, private or public, if I am not confirmed by at least one person (preferably more) in the area. Recently it has been with composing. I write something and even if I finish it and really finish it after some editing, I am still not quite satisfied. I try to voice my emotions/thoughts over a specific thing in the piece and it pretty much comes out, but the style, that style I can hear through each song whatever it is about. And it’s my style. Unfortunately, I do not entirely like it right now. I could never really understand why, when I finished that song, I was still not satisfied with it. In fact in general I am unsatisfied with my compositions. I realized later that it is because no one has confirmed it with any adjectives like “inspiring” or “beautiful” or “unique, but good” so how can I be satisfied? (not saying this is logical) I have been confirmed in my piano playing, for instance, or my fashion and so I am satisfied and enjoy them no matter if they are successful or not.

            Apparently some part of me which is never really admitted to the larger part of me needs that confirmation. And I wish that I could enjoy something, think well of it as pleasing until to the Lord and not be unfulfilled in private or public endeavors.

            How does this apply? Well what if I am never confirmed as “great,” never truly recognized, as some aren’t. Does that make all of us middling?

            And then God said to me: “Do you have to be recognized by humans in order to be deemed ‘great’? Can you not believe I have given you this surpassing power as I have said, and believe that you have it? Many seem weak but they are strong. You know this. ‘For when [you] are weak, [you] are strong.’ (2 Cor. 12:10b) Faith is believing in what is unseen and unheard. I am teaching you another lesson of faith, and you also wanted to learn to not need confirmation for contentment in your abilities, I am teaching you that. Believe that you have greatness and My power and go forward.”

I may or may not be ever recognized for any “greatness” but faith in what He gives should sustain me. He said He would give, so He will.

So what does that look like? What if right now I am not doing anything splendid? Not raising up churches or performing miracles? (example only) Joseph was in jail for years before he ever set about God’s work actively. So was he not great while sitting in jail? Were those years wasted? No, greatness can be just pleasing and glorifying God every day, in everything you do.

Pictures from God: Why does God hate sin?

Pictures from God: Why does God hate sin?

"The Lord hates sin, [not you when you fail] because He loves you--because [He knows] sin devastates your soul."

When I read that today, it definitely opened my eyes. I realized I had never associated love with God’s reasons for hating sin. I knew on one end that He loves in the most powerful, all-consuming way, in a way that I could use endless adjectives to describe it. I also feel that God hates sin because that it puts a blot on His creations (and all that encompass that from the world to animals, nature, humans, etc…) Not that Satan has total victory and totally destroys any last trace of God on His creations but that sin has imperfected what was perfect. But I never connected God’s love for us with His rejection of sin and all that it is.

Because He loves us so much, and He knows the devastation, the horrible impact of sin on us body and soul, He hates sin. Our devastation pains Him so He hates sin. That is one aspect of God’s rejection of sin that I now understand. And it really amazed me, as He always does.

The definition of "respect"

The other day I was praying and suddenly realized, I was talking to God in my usual rather casual, eager self as I lay down to go to sleep (I usually talk this way in the darkness and privacy at night after the day has ended) how informally I was addressing this King of Kings and great I Am. I caught myself winking and even pointing at Him and paused in embarrassment. Did I just do that to my God who sits on a high throne? And then I asked myself the question: was I being disrespectful?

Respect…I always know I need to show it to God, to my elders, really to everyone in general, but especially the elders and God. I always know and agree that showing “respect” is putting those above oneself, honoring them, submitting to their will even. But I always realized then that I associate containment with respect as well. Containment of self, which usually requires reservation of blunt gestures and behavior, talking in quieter tones, not show too much of my spastic side, and of course no vulgarity or show of natural humanness. All these are increased in degree depending on the eminence or status of the entity. And God is the highest of them all.

But then how does that coincide with the concept of God’s absolute love of His creation and His perfect knowledge and acceptance of us through Jesus? Doesn’t total acceptance mean acceptance of all flaws? He knows we are human; He does not expect us to be perfect and realizes that even more than we do sometimes. So why should I “contain” myself, any of myself, for the sake of “respect?” He knows all sides of me, accepts all sides of me, rejects the sin yes…but is full of grace and love.

When did containment become associated to me with respect? I wondered that. The education of the expectations of humans. I was raised well and was taught well in manners and what is to be expected in conduct with others. I value this education. And yes, humans define respect in association with containment, I think. Maybe it started in the 19^th Century when modesty and “children say nothing at the table” sort of attitude and conduct was expected and demanded. Or even before that with the Catholic Church. Maybe humans feel the need to suppress the obvious fact that we are so horribly imperfect, so that attempts to “contain” what was defined as “bad” and “imperfect” behavior was then associated with “respectful” conduct and that definition of “bad” behavior was grown over time.

Proverbs give verses like: “He who winks the eye causes trouble, and a babbling fool will be thrown down.” (Prov. 10:10) or “He who guards his mouth and his tongue, guards his soul from troubles.” (Prov. 21: 23)  Also one of the fruits of the Spirit is “self-control.” With humans, I acknowledge all this is especially important. If one speaks carelessly and says a falsehood or something unintentional, another human may be deceived in two ways: considering the falsehood true or mistaking the unintentional remark with as having a bad intention or meaning behind it. How could they read into what you meant? And how could they be wise enough to know wrong from right if you speak something as truth? Therefore, it IS important to “bridle the tongue” as James speaks about in order to avoid the important weight of words (yes words are very influential whether you mean them to be or not) influencing for the wrong. But don’t mistake a young spirit for non-self-control.

Timothy says “Let no one look down on…youthfulness.” (1 Tim. 4:12) A youthful innocent, pure spirit is a praise-worthy trait in a person. But lack of consideration, immaturity in the way of attitude (which results in certain actions) and such is not righteous.

With God, though, I also realize, unlike limited humans, He has full knowledge of your past, present, and future, of your innermost being and all that it contains, He is your designer, He knows the effects sin has on His perfect creation and what that means, He is filled with love, despite all this, and acceptance and grace. He never misunderstands but fully understands. He never criticizes (but rebukes of course, as He should) but acknowledges imperfections and has grace and even, I personally believe, joy in the midst of imperfections, knowing that though there are all these imperfections, He has created something truly wonderful and is proud of. So the imperfections, in the end, dim in what He sees compared to the beauty of what He sees.

So with God, containment is unnecessary. He understands if you blabbered something foolish unintentionally, if you show that rather embarrassing, casual, natural side of you and He does not misunderstand or become impatient but rather smiles and simply knows. Knows what even you and I don’t know or comprehend.

And so, I accept my imperfections and show respect to God but not by the human-applicable definition of respect. And as I have “oops” moments with imperfections or speak rather casually and comfortably with God (at times, though I do believe in formal times with bowing and showing not only in mind but body of respect and reverence to God) not bothering to fall on my knees every time I submit a prayer to Him or decide to speak and share with Him in conversation, I am certain He accepts this and even smiles.